NYE Resolutions

I heard on television this morning that for the New Year, one should reassess what in their life needs to be let go, what needs to be held onto/fought for, and what needs to be let alone.  I just figured out what needs to be let alone...and it hurts more than it should.

Realizing a friendship has changed is part of growing up and part of life.  I have met so many amazing people in my life that I can't feel anything other than blessed.  I have also lost, more to growing apart than fights, numerous friends throughout my 27 years.  The biggest life lessons on friendship came during the 2 1/2 years after undergrad and before graduate school...most of you have heard me rant about those years so I'll spare you, but lets just say I learned the meaning of true friendship during those years.  I am blessed I had those experiences and learned those lessons early in life; it helps me cope when bumps like these arise.

Thanks to the wonders of facebook, I don't have to truly let alone that which I am "letting be."  But I will make myself, out of respect for them and myself.  A very good friend of mine recently took a rather large step in his/her life and I never, for a minute, doubted our friendship.  I'm going to have to realize and accept that this is not the case.  (Before you go thinking "Oh my, who could Carrie be talking about?  Is it me?  Bitch," I can promise you it's not.  It's HIGHLY unlikely that this person knows I have a blog, let alone reads it.)  This person and I have family and friends in common, so we will cross paths.  But, in the spirit of letting it alone, I will smile and accept the changes and continue being supportive of their life choices.  I've cried over lost and changed friendships before, but I haven't quite cried over this one.  Yet it still really, really hurts.

Therefore, for my NYE Resolution I will strive to be more attentive to my friends, especially those I am lax in calling back (you know who you are mister!).  I will do my best to save more (money, time, etc) and impulse spend/waste less.  Exercise more, though not to lose weight but to regain a healthy lifestyle.  And enjoy life - the ups, the downs, the in-betweens - as much as I can.  Doing more things for myself and less for what I think others "expect" of me - which I have started with my trip to England.  And lastly, to stop being so hard on myself; this encompasses quite a lot, but mainly to accept my faults and my quirks, and to give myself a chance.  These are a lot of resolutions, but I believe they are all part of the same - to live life to its fullest responsibly, adventurously (is that a word?), and optimistically.